Nervous

I have had no less than 2 full blown anxiety attacks since Friday. I am so nervous about getting the results from my CT scan... I'm anticipating them canceling the biopsy and opting for a full removal. I'm also scared to pieces that they are going to tell me I have cancer.

If I do have a full removal, my mom is going to come and be with me. That coupled with my fears of hearing the C word and dying (yes I am being very dramatic) I have started the process of getting my affairs in order.

I don't know if I am the only one who does this, but I have a fear of dying young and unexpectedly. I get totally freaked out about people having to take care of my stuff after I am gone, lol. I think, goodness, if I were to die today, what would people think of my craft room? Haha. It was totally pitted out, like since October! (my last craft show)

So- with my mom's possible visit, coupled with my fear of death, I decided to attack the craft room. But I have been so tired that physically doing anything has been extremely difficult. I was talking to my friend April and she said that I had until 6 pm to get it cleaned up, because she was going to come and look at it. She also said she would bring lemon pepper chicken and I would make the sides and we would all have dinner.

So, faced with the threat of an outsider viewing "the hoard" (my nickname for the room) I forced myself to do what I could. I sent her a text at 5:45 asking her what sides to make and she responded, "oh no, totally forgot, we just picked up dinner... Did u get the room done?". LMAO! That birch tricked me! I'm grateful, but ugh! I don't know what I was thinking having a whole room dedicated to crafting! It's like a goldfish, it will grow to the size of the tank, and mine had grown so large it was starting to crave human flesh!

It's not done, but it is so much better. Now I just have to focus on downsizing and organizing. I'm trying to enlist a fabric folder and yarn sorter for tomorrow, we'll see how that pans out!

Hopefully my ENT will decide and inform me of what's happening next in regards to Forrest Lump so I can maybe breathe a bit.